Acceptance for many is a tricky concept. For me, acceptance doesn’t mean approval it means agreement. For example if I walk into a room that is painted blue, I can decide I like it or don’t like it. Here I am some form of approval either for or against. If I accept it, the blue ceases to be an issue of any sort.
Recently after running late, I took a calculated risk at a traffic light. The light was orange, and I decided I had enough time to get through before the red. 50 meters down the road, the police man asked me if I knew why he stopped me. I didn’t. He explained two things. I broke a red light and my tires were not safe.
I didn’t argue. I was polite so was he. I didn’t tell him it was my birthday. I found a space in myself that I was grateful he had mentioned my tires. I had been procrastinating about them. I accepted the fine and drove off with a smile on my face.
Later that day while on the way to celebrate my birthday, my friend mentioned to me that I was calm, in her experience birthdays were always a stress with messages and phone calls and panic from everyone. I explained I was relaxed, I was expecting no one to show up. Circumstances dictated that many of the people I had hoped to see had already said they couldn’t make it.
For a while, I tried not to feel embarrassed for her. There was just her, another friend, and myself. I was happy. But I wondered how they were feeling. A little later some more people came and we were six. Then another, then we went to see some music. Then another friend arrived. I sang with my musician friends. I was relaxed and in joy the whole evening. It was beautiful. I had a choice. I had a choice to be offended by those who didn’t show up, or didn’t message me, or perhaps don’t care in the way I do.
I didn’t really have to make a choice, as I was in total acceptance. I am grateful I am here, I am grateful, my friend who I mentioned at the start made an amazing effort to decorate my home give me gifts before we went out. I am grateful for the warning about my tires. I don’t mind the fine and the points, it happens.
Accepting the day as it was and it’s events just made it all the more sweeter. So when you are finding things not going to the way you might say is the best possible outcome, is it possible to suggest to yourself, that however it is, is actually the best it can be?
Let go of the expectations, enjoy what is, and just appreciate that what you already have, is more than good enough.